1. Don’t be that “nice girl”

This isn’t about how to play game or how to manipulate someone. What would happen if you let him know from day one that you are willing to bend over backward? He will think you are DESPERATE, and he will want to see how far you are willing to bend.

Overcompensating or being too eager to please will lessen a man’s respect; it will give the kiss of death to his attention, and it will put limit on the relationship.

The nice girl makes the mistake of being available all the time. “I don’t want to play games”, she says. So she lets him see how afraid she is to be without him and he soon comes to put you as a back up plan.

A bitch is more selective about her availability. She is only available sometimes; other times she is not. But she is nice. Nice enough to consider his preference for when he’d like to see her.



2. It is your attitude about yourself that a man will adopt

A beautiful woman can make herself look ugly in the eyes of a man if she is very insecure. He pursued you; therefore he finds you very attractive.

An understated demeanor and a confident attitude will convince him you are gorgeous. Never assume you are not attractive enough, and therefore you have to overcompensate or chase a man.

Taste is subjective.

The first date is about looks. When he falls in love, it is about your attitude. A woman looks more secure in a man's eyes when he can't pull her away from her life, because she is content with her life.

Good girl: she always senses how happy he is, paying close attention to his approval of her
VS
bitch: she doesn't obsess over his opinion or need his approval for everything
Surprisingly, men are more attracted to the bitches.



3. The biggest variable between a bitch and a woman who is too nice is FEAR

The bitch shows she is not afraid to be without him. She just doesn't make decision based on the fear of losing a man. The bitch remains the person she is throughout her relationship with a man.

She doesn't lose her friends. She doesn't give up her career or her hobbies. She doesn't give up all of her time or give in everything. She doesn't stop making time for things she did when she was single.

But nice girl did everything: She cancels a hair appointment for a date with him. She stops going to yoga class, and she stops playing tennis on weekends.

Men don't give up "boys' night out". Men don't give up their work or their sleep or their food. So don't give up yours!

The reason the nice girl gives up these activities is also telling of her self-confidence. Often she gives up something because she fears he won't like her the way she is.

The nice girl gives away too much of herself when pleasing him regularly becomes more important than pleasing herself.

It is like a reverse magnet. Because she is not needy, he starts to need her. Because she isn't dependent on him, he begins to depend on her.



4. A bitch gives a man plenty of space

Don't ever make him feel you are taking away all his freedom; when he does he starts to run away from you. Don't make plan for him ; he shall plan for you. Remember: You are not always available for him.

Always give the appearance that he has plenty of space. It gets him to drop his guard.

The more relaxed he is, the less guarded he will be and then it's only matter of time before he will tell you everything you ever want to know without you asking (eg: where are you going) And when he does go out with his boys, he won't be able to wait to get home to you.

Men are scared to death of losing control of their freedom.

Don't call or text him constantly when he didn't response. Take your own sweet time to reply even after he did. It only makes him wonder what you are doing now.



5. A bitch respects herself at the same time respecting him

A relationship does't only need trust, it needs mutual respect too. A bitch respects her relationship with her man. She respects his pride and ego.

She does not go around and tell people her relationship problem especially on social media. Because she knows that doesn't solve the problem. Damaging his images, ego and pride on social media only make him more resent.

She tells them straight to his face.

Because no one is involved in their relationship except themselves.

And she knows no one really cares.



Make your choice: Bitch or Nice girl
There are plenty of men know how to cherish a lady, why stay with someone who doesn't?

Disclaimer: I am not a love guru. Some parts of my life I have to face relationship problems as well. I am not implying that my boyf will stay with me forever because no one knows about the future.

Of course I didn't write them myself, I referred to this amazing book "WHY MEN LOVE BITCHES" by Sherry Argov. I summarized all the key points into a relatively short blog post. But I learnt how to be a bitch through a hard way.